Chronic Suicide Support

Full Version: The Universal Vending Machine
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And out comes Jack, the Giant, and the Goose who Laid the Golden Egg!

I toss in a can of compressed air....
And out pops the Jolly Green Giant!

He throws in some paper towels...
and out comes a wormhole through time!

I throw in whatever is on top of Mt. Laundry.....
And out pops a bouquet of papier machet sweetpeas!

I throw in my car keys on accident along with some Canadian change...
and out pops the Starship Enterprise with a full tank of dilithium crystals!

I throw in my last package of Top Ramen and fifty cents I needed to keep the rent check from bouncing,,,,,
You get a copper sculpture showing a bowl of noodle soup

I throw in a little bottle full of green nail polish
And out comes a quarter because it's no fun if it's just a wish-granting machine with no surprises

So I throw in this Algebra text I never really understood, cross my fingers, hope for the best and......
Out pops a map of the universe, like the one in Time Bandits with all the portals and black holes and all... which i never really understood myself XD

So i toss in an unmatched pair of socks and a lampshade....
… and out pops a beautifully patterned lampshade, but it's somehow smelly…

I toss in some uncooked noodles and a snowflake!
And out comes some slightly soggy but cooked noodles!

I throw in an old notebook with some old rough drafts of old letters my old crush never even read....
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